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Tuesday, July 27, 2010

Michelle Tips You!

                        I am Michelle, I am Aditya/@TaiyousSun's Labrador retriever, and I see world in a different way, and have some peculiar way of practicing them, and I expresses absolute disgust at Human ways. Here are my tips for you:

  1. There is no specific time to sleep, sleep when you feel like, and wake up when you feel like.
  2. Eat whenever you feel the need to, you are not supposed to eat just because it is there served in a dish for you.
  3. Do not eat with your butt in one place, at least do not sleep or sit while eating, like any buffet, take a bite, walk some distance and then consume you food. This also keeps you fit!
  4. There is no need to do any work, you just need to find the right master and be friends with him/her and family.
  5. You can be friends with anyone, all you need is right approach, and then be it cats, dogs, birds, and most difficult Humans.
  6. With small children, babies, keep the distance, they only like to see you, and even that may make them cry, only go near if they smile and put a hand forward, then too bring your softest side close to them.
  7. Toddlers, will keep their distance or will get close to you, sit down and let them touch your soft side.
  8. Once in a while you may find a rotten one, who would try to hit you, but you will not get hurt.
  9. Slightly older children can keep their balance and are the once you can play with and jump around with, still do not let your teeth touch them. 
  10. Do not show your teeth to people you want to be friends with.
  11. Go for a walk every day.
  12. When it comes to smell, do not limit your experience to flowers alone, there are large varieties of smell out there!
  13. Dry shit is best chewing thing there is after bones, not sticky gums.
  14. Size matters, larger ball is more fun, you can kick around, and it will return to you, would not get stuck under sofa.
  15. Cover up your pee, do not pee on open cemented ground, either seek out a cloth, but best is a mud ground; it soaks up everything and does not smell bad.
       That's enough for one day; you can come back to my class, whenever I feel like taking one! Bye for now! Woof! 

Sunday, July 25, 2010

You are There!

I am running around
having time of my life
fun it is 
all the way
I look around
You are there
Looking at me
finding
your fun in my fun
having time of your life
I am winning something
a taste of success
a first for me
applause all around
I look around
You are there
applauding me
celebrating it along
I lose something
something dear to me
sorrow in my heart
I look around 
You are there
closer than normal
holding me
sharing my sorrow
I am down for count
facing defeat
pain in bones
I look around
You are there
healing my wounds
As I wonder
if I were 
in your shoes
would I have stayed
you are still there
smiling
holding my hand
tapping my head
comforting me to sleep
for now
and I know
in my heart
You will be there
besides me
as I dream on........ 

Wednesday, July 21, 2010

Hamlet!

The Tragedy of Hamlet, Prince of Denmark, or more simply Hamlet, is a tragedy by William Shakespeare, believed to have been written between 1599 and 1601. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hamlet ; but little would have Shakespeare ever imagined, that his play's name would be so famous in India, and would turn and cry in his grave, if he could!

While driving out of this college gates, a watchman stops you and asks: "Hamlet kahan hai?" (Where is the Hamlet?) This Hamlet; called Helmet in pure English, is a big issue in Pune, where maximum number of two-wheelers are driven! Most do not like to use it, for aesthetic reasons.

These Aesthetic reasons are quite a few to list; still here are some of them:
  1. Air does not gush through the hair, if you wear Helmet! Free flowing hair in wind, that rushes past you, an awesome feeling, and the real thrill of speed can only be experienced on bike. After all, this free flowing polluted air, having lead from exhaust does not only rush past hair, it also ensure that humans progress in evolution by losing unnecessary facial hair and we welcome the most progressed and intellectual bald heads.
  2. Vision is not clear! After all Helmets are only designed for 20-20 vision, not more than that. This limitation on vision often leads to missing an important pair of beautiful legs walking on the side of road!
  3. One protester says: "I bought this cool Yamaha FZ-16 at such a high price, so as to get girls attention and also zip through the city! This Helmet thing is so uncool! Out of fashion! "Yes, a gear that you have to wear, which will conceal your face while riding a thing that was bought only to show-off, kills the motive all together!
  4. I wear Pagdi; so not applicable to me says 1 Sikh boy, a valid reason, Pagdi is thicker than Helmet! When his companion is asked same question, she replies: "I am also a Sikh!"
  5. "Helmet cutters are not available, in case head gets hurt, Doctors would not even get chance to save you!" But, if it were not for that Helmet, they would not make it to Hospital in first place.
And then there is this other class of people who adore Hamlet so much, that they could watch anything that sounds like Hamlet, I mean anything; even Hamlet. They have their reasons too, and politicians support them whole heartedly, the list is as follows.
  1. "This hamlet, is our perfect accomplice in our work, be it chain snatching, eve-teasing, robbery, etc. all are done very easily, none get to see our face, and Hamlet does not reveal truths." On this an India Live Tv reporter asked a question: "Would police not catch you by your vehicle number?" The representative from gang: "Did I not mention robbery? And also, as my face would not be visible, I can slip through the law for lack of evidence."
  2. While conducting riots for one or the other leader, it becomes easy to avoid fatal blows! This makes it clear why politicians root for helmets all the time.
In end I wonder when will hamlet take it's rightful place, and when will Helmet be called Helmet and would be worn for one reason for which it is made.

Monday, July 19, 2010

Kashmir Issue.

Yesterday, I read @Aagan86's blog about Kashmir and Lamhaa the movie, one thing came to my mind was: "What would happen, if India declared Kashmir independent, and withdrew all troops over night!" Only a hypothetical development, as if it would ever happen! And I would certainly not do so, even if I were the whole and sole authority on the decision of Kashmir.


The immediate questions that would arise, and would certainly make Pakistan scramble for action.


1. Pakistan would have to declare independence of Pakistan occupied Kashmir (POK) and recognize it as a free country and lastly withdraw troops too, unless it decides to stop over and help valley "Develop!"


2. If Pakistan decides to execute 1st point, then it would have to answer bitter questions about territory it gifted away to China, which certainly would not be part of Sovereign state of Kashmir anymore and hence new struggle will ensue.


3. Now, in-case Pakistan does not execute 1st point that would be like welcoming trouble with both arms. The insurgency, terrorism or revolution or whatever they supported from across the border, would be dissatisfied and turn against Pakistan. And only worst thing than a strong intelligent enemy is an emotional, fooled, disillusioned former friend turned foe.


However, bright it seems for India to give up on Kashmir, so as to add some more trouble on plate of Pakistan and China, India would have some trouble to handle too!

1. Kashmiri Pundit’s would agitate, and so would other Kashmiri's who are working in other parts of India.


2. Hopes of China, regarding other disputed territories such as Sikkim and Arunachal Pradesh would increase, which India does not need.


3. But 1st and foremost, reason to not cede territory is Indian notion, where in our land is equivalent to our mother, and hence not to be given to someone, that implies: "Hindus would cause a Riot."


In-case Pakistan gives up on Kashmir?

1. Even if Pakistani leadership gives up on Kashmir, military would never do so! As it would see ultimate defeat of their own, hence they would do what they know best: Overthrow democratic government and establish military rule.


2. All groups Jihadist, peaceful ones and all such organizations would turn against Pakistan Government, which is already facing terrorist activities, and this will only add to it.


3. Kashmiris: Hurriyat parties, peaceful, and non-peaceful organization will also turn foes of Pakistan, which will be difficult to tackle.

After thinking on all these points, It seems Kashmiris are caught in catch22 situation of the two quarrelling countries. And therefore I wonder if India, Pakistan and China (Marginal role) would ever resolve the Kashmir issue!

Aagan's blog post: http://aaganzworld.blogspot.com/2010/07/kashmir-must-live-on.html

Tuesday, July 13, 2010

So how much do you earn?

A normal train journey, overnight and Lucky would be back to city he chose for his education and subsequently for job, some sleep and some reading was all that he needed to pass the time and he had the goods, mom's own recipe Paneer(Cottage Cheese ) chilly for dinner. To add to the perfect night, 2 perfect girls walk in, together! Only if forth occupant had been some nice guy, or even better some old person or another woman, it would have been better than perfect night, but it were not too be so!

There walked in a brute guy, who was wearing cheap imitation clothes, and fluxed his muscles more than his brain, and soon girls decided to turn in, to ignore his over probing questions. Well! None should ask "So, are you virgin on any date!" Certainly not the first question! That finished any chance of knowing them!

Next, this guy, who calls himself as "Myself Gobind!" turns to Lucky, and starts chatting up. Lucky thinks this guy is impossible to stop, and forget girls, no reading is going to be possible here, and to avoid questions like: "So what have you invested in?" takes a cue from girls and follows suit.

And sleep it is, though it is only 19:00 O'clock for now it is aided by slow gazals, almost lullaby kind of music plays in background on Gobind's cell phone. In backdrop of music and closed eyes, a thought crosses lucky's mind, before sleep: This guy is never going to earn more than me, not even what i earn in a month, would he make in an year!

Suddenly, in dead of night, tap....tap....sound starts and gets louder, and ends with a tap on Lucky's back and wakes up, to see TC-Ticket Collector. Lucky gets up and finds the two girls are also up and next see's the police in cabin! Lucky thinks he is dreaming, but then crying girls and inspectors questions drill in the reality. Gobind has vanished with all their luggage, girls have lost their cell phones too and it is only 21:00 o'clock, in just 2 hours, Lucky's perfect night had turned into unluckiest one!

Girls had their home number, on memory, and Lucky had his cell phone and purse, that helped inspector verify their identities. Finally at 22:00 O'clock girls get to call up their respective parents, and a bigger scam surfaces, both their parents got an SMS, asking for debit card pins and their parents, knowing and loving their forgetful daughter, replied with every pin number via SMS! Resultant, bank accounts were drained off of by total of 2 lakh rupees (INR 200,000)!

Lucky, being a finance professional made a total summary of amount that Gobind could make by selling all the stuff (3 latest laptops-1IBM think pad, 2 Sony Vaio, two 32GB I-phones, jewellery worth INR 100,000, branded clothes, 3-I pods, designer bags, make-up box!) All added up to 600,000 INR! That's about 200,000 more than what Lucky makes in a year, all gained in just a day of work!

Thursday, July 1, 2010

Dil Banjara!



Dil Banjara
Nachta
Gata Phire
Koi Rasta
koi Sapn
Raina
Dhundta Phire
koi ho na ho
koi mile na mile
ye toh
chalta chale
Rukena
ruke toh
zindagi ruk jaye
socho toh
thami zindagi
jineme
kahan
koi
maza aaye
Dil Banjara
Nachta
Gata Phire
Kabhi Dhup
Kabhi chav
chahta phire
koi apnasa
pyarasa
khojta phire
mil jayejo
sathi koi
sath
nibhata chale
socho toh
akele
safar main
kahan
maza aaye
Dil Banjara
Nachta
Gata Phire.....