Celeb teachings!

 When I was first told that you can learn from all and sundry, I was quite sceptical, specially the sundry part; but now after joining the banking industry I have learnt that sundry is a very important account, specially when it comes to banking and more importantly the life.

So I took upon a list of things that one can learn from people:

1. SRK: One can learn, how not to talk about subjects which you are not really well versed with; don’t believe me, look at him, he is in far lesser controversies than before.

2. Nirmal Baba: People will listen to any crap advice, and will follow them, if you charge them 10% of their salary.

3. Paris Hilton: If you have the looks, no matter what you do, you will be missed, so do spend some extra time in gym & some money on the looks, + look good on whatever you are doing, you might be facing camera, who knows!

4. Abishekh Manu Singhvi: Pay & treat your driver(key men) well, they wont have any reason to put your dirty laundry to dry in public.

5. Barak Obama: Get what you could till you can, you may not get a second term. That Nobel prize is quite a thing you know.

6. Shahid Kapoor: Break up can be a blessing in disguise. Don’t hide in your room, meet new people.

7. Saif Ali Khan: Hook up may not always be a blessing.

8. Bejan Daruwala: Well, I was told 7 is lucky for me, so I am stopping here. Hope you gain something too!

9. Shashi Tharoor: Don't comment on something, using phrases which do not match up with local sensibilities, you might have to give up your elite position and join the cattle club. 

10. N D Tiwari: You are as young as you make your body feel. 

Just wind; river and moon!

In a small town;

in the country side;

after dark;

after sleep has taken its toll;

In the silence of the night;

by the dark window;

sits a young widow;

with a twinkle in her eye;

calling out to the stars;

with her soothing smile;

looking up to the sky;

as her hair;

take to the air;

a serene beauty;

she does not object;

she does not

run a finger through them;

she closes her eyes;

lets the gentle wind;

feels the breeze;

livening up her smile.

I seat in shadow;

of a tree;

bewitched;

fixed in my gaze;

she served me all morning;

and never did I

see the person;

behind those rough hands;

rough by her karma;

the mundane house work;

fourteen hours behind curtains;

the unbreakable prison;

the invisible chains;

the prison of clothes;

the chains of traditions;

slave by day;

night is hers;

freedom she seeks;

freedom to feel;

just nature;

no lust;

no love;

just wind, river and moon!

that’s all;

what made her smile;

her smile!

Dancing in moon light;

singing all alone

to herself;

till the crack of dawn;

she smiled away;

and then

the prison;

the chains;

recaptured her;

resting her spirit;

she went on working;

working all the day;

serving;

not uttering a word;

that sweet voice;

was lost by day;

I

nor the hero;

neither the villain;

but a mere spectator;

each night;

each day;

and the days to come

and nights to come……..

Just wind; river and moon!

Dosti

Na kuch tumne kahan,

na kuch humne kahan,

buss chupki liye hum,

zindagi bitate chale gaye,

tum apne karmose,

hum apne karmose jujte chale gaye,

kabhi hum dost the,

aaj bhi hain;

par dosti kahin gum hain,

kisi mod pe,

takrayenge kabhi hum,

toh kya pehchan hogi

ek duge ki?

na jane,

kaise

ajnabi

ban jayenge

jigri dost bhi

yun kabhi.......

ek shabdh, ek awaz

ek pal ki duri na thi kabhi

phir kya pata

ek pal bhi dekhenge

ek dujhe ko bhi

Na kuch tumne kahan,

na kuch humne kahan,

samay ki duri hai

mushkil badi

hath mile

par

kya dil milenge abhi

kya wo halki si muskan

banegi tahako ki hassi

chutkiyo main plan honge 

kya phir kabhi?

bin bole

kya samjhenge 

wo baat unkahee?

ya phir

busss yunh hi

bhul jayenge

wo sath bitaye 

pal sabhi

ya phir koi banayenge

yadgar koi?

Na kuch tumne kahan,

na kuch humne kahan,

Hero!

He was a Hero;

of this era;

I would have liked to be;

Irony

He always said;

be yourself

follow your heart!

He brought life

to his

Dream!

Took it to highs!

Only to be

Snatched!

From him

He kept on fighting;

never ever

did he gave up!

Springed back!

Stronger!

When ever

His critics;

His enemies;

wrote him off!

For he had;

Passion!

Grit!

&

Pulse!

To keep going!

Without him;

his dream stumbled;

Without his dream;

he stumbled;

Until;

they were united;

To Take on the world!

To change the world!

To live behind;

a legacy!

Unchallenged!

In its time.

Disowned at birth;

loved by billions in life;

February 24, 1955 – October 5, 2011.

Steve Jobs & his Apple.

I have hated Apple company for evicting Steve in first place, and when he got back I have not liked it’s product for putting a price tag on all the things other than the instrument it self. But still, Steve & his Apple did shape the tech world and its path from Windows to Android, all followed what Steve’s vision! In end, it looked liked he knew long back, that it was his time, handing over reins of his dream, in real sense was hint enough. Salute to him.   

Moments I should have had…….

Everyone falls in love some or the other time and everyone has some notions about what would they do in a certain situation, when they are with someone special. I too had my notions about certain situations, and as most know I had a love marriage, some came true and some dint; no regrets, but given a chance to go back, I would like to include them in my life experiences, some such situations, and why they did not get fulfilled are:

1. The girl I secretly love rests her head on my shoulder and sleeps while travelling in a bus, and in order to not wake her up, I travel to the end of line along with her and then we end up spending whole day together, while missing few lectures.

I started using bike for daily travel in 8th standard, almost never travelled by bus there after!

2. Hide that we love each other from our friends for few days and make up stories to avoid going out with group and getting lost together, more often than tolerable by group, as a result, arousing suspicions among group members.

My group knew before us, that we were in love!

3. Kissing on a railway platform!

Not possible, it is India dude! You may get booked on even if you are married,for you hugged your woman little longer than a natural wink, let alone girlfriend.

4. Spending a night outside in wilderness, just counting stars, and talking, no sleep.

I went to Dang district in Gujarat to fulfil this dream, twice and ended up sick both times, putting an end to my love for camping; also they separated girls tent area from boys, no chance to sneak out.

5. Getting drenched in rain and using fire to dry both of us in a cave….etc.

It is hard to find cave in city, besides I have sinusitis which catches on pretty fast if I get drenched.

6. Playing a lead role in a romantic drama and making the lead actress fall in love with me.

I auditioned, they selected me to carry props from dressing room to stage and back.

7. Run away with my love interest.

Our parents agreed without much protest.

8. To propose her at some exotic place, where no one else is there except for the splendid beauty of mother nature.

I never proposed! Till I was already married that is.

9. To waltz my way to her heart. That is, dance!

I have two left feet, an immovable / inflexible waist and no sense of rhythm. Plus, it would not have been a surprise if I had taken her for the dance class, and I did not find any other partners.

10. To have bed of flower in a garden and play in it.

Jetendra Movies are known to exaggerate, such things are expensive and may contain ants, so not meant for sleeping!

You too must have had a similar list, or may still have, if feel like, do share below!

Agar kabhi hogi meri koi beti…….

Agar kabhi hogi meri

koi beti

sar par chada rakhunga

use mein har ghadi

phir kuch bhi kahe

uski maa bhi

nahi sunuga mein kisi ki

Sikhaunga

padh waunga use

banegi wo

jo chahe

uska dil bhi

hogi uski

ho sake mujhse

jo khwaish

har so khwaish

puri

phir kyun na ho

uske pyar se uski shadi

Mere dar par

jo aaenge kabhi barathi

utarvaunga unki aarti

jhut jo bole toh

Dando se padhwaunga Pharsi

karvaunga unse

apne haatho ki safai

Mere dar par

jo aaenge abhi barati

Dunga sona-chandi

beti na hogi meri

kabhi parayi

par jo manga dahej

muh hoga unka

Kaala neela peela

Hathkadio se karaunga

jaan-pehchaan unki

Mere dar par

jo aaenge kabhi barati

muskan se rahe

meri rajkumari

chaunga mein hamesha yehi

par jo kharoch lagvay use koi

toh karva dunga

hadi-pasli ek unki

Agar hogi jo

meri beti kabhi

toh na hogi

wo lachar kabhi

apne pairon pe khade raheneki

hogi usme shamta bhari

par na hogi wo

akeli kabhi

Agar hogi jo

meri beti kabhi……

Why you flew to the moon?

Why you flew to the moon?

leaving me all alone

I can’t decide

at these cross roads of life

on these crowded streets

no hand to hold on to

Why you flew to the moon?

not taking me along

I have tears in my eyes

no one there to wipe them out

on these rainy nights

I can’t see you among stars

Why you flew to the moon?

snapping my dreams

in a flash of light

darkness wins

my heart succumbs to fears

forgotten in your arms

Why you flew to the moon?

with cradle at my arm

I can’t fend for myself

who is there?

to protect me

when shadows lurk in dark

Why you flew to the moon?

death could have waited

a bit longer

you dint fight

was I not reason enough?

to live on

Why you flew to the moon?

the child is

still unnamed

who will hold it’s finger?

What shall I tell?

What star shall I point to?

Why you flew to the moon?

I have questions

you left unanswered

what was the hurry?

God!

We had no enemies!

Why you flew to the moon?

We were to

grow old together

I used to love that sound

why did it stop beating?

my ear on your heart

Why you flew to the moon?

What did go wrong?

You were to come back

at end of day

like every other day

by sunset

Why you flew to the moon?

Why is there no sunrise again?

where is my fairy-tale?

Where is my

"And they

lived happily ever after?"

Why an abrupt end?

Why you flew to the moon?

I used to hear your

foot steps

now all I hear

are memories

replaying themselves

Why you flew to the moon?

Eloped!

The boy loves girl, girl loves boy, parents disagree, so they elope and live happily ever after! And while they elope, the couples have no tension whatsoever! Here are some points that get dropped from the real to reel scripts.

It takes courage to elope, and once you do you can not go back, this goes double for girls in India.

Some parents may even consider killing the couple up, to save the “Honour” of the family, in process becoming murderers, and how that is honourable is a big question for me.

However, once you have decided to elope, thinking it would be fun to do so, there are few points you should keep in mind, else you will be left very dissatisfied with the adventure.

Check your age.

There is no use in eloping, even if one of you is underage, for you won’t be able to marry anyway, till you attend the maturity age, which is 18 for Girls and 21 for boys.

Be familiar with law.

The better you know register marriage law, better are your chances of planning your steps, there are different laws for different types of marriages, inter-caste, inter-religion, and even for different religions (where bride and groom are of same religion).

This might help: http://lawcommissionofindia.nic.in/reports/report211.pdf

Plan your exit from the city.

Where do you think it would be safe for you to go, how much time will you have on your hand before complain is filled with police, and how are you going to travel.

Don’t use your current vehicle.

If using a bike/car as a gate away vehicle, you will be easily traced and caught by your number plate, same goes for your best friends vehicle. Easy way out, selloff your current bike, that will lead police on a wild goose chase, while you buy a second hand bike, with all papers, owners signature et all, but don’t transfer it on your name immediately.

Use cash, and have cash.

Don’t even think of using plastic money, use cash and only cash, even though you are using cash, police will still know how much cash you are carrying, if you have only one source. So its better to pool your resources, let your friends use your credit card and debit card while you take cash from them. A large debit from your own account can arouse suspicion, so manage using alternate means. Also if your friends go off to some place and use your card, it will lead police to that place, which can serve as a warning to you.

Drop your smart phones, drop your old sim cards.

Get new numbers, not on your own name for both and new phones, no frill phones. Stay off the social networking sites, do not even login into your email accounts, drop of the radar, the modern underground.

Don’t stay anywhere more than 24 hours.

You can stay with your friends from other cities, or people you know, but not for long, don’t let people other than your friends get to know more about you.

Don’t leave a trail.

After, changing vehicle, handsets, not logging in, not showing your face to many people, still word of mouth trail can be caught by tracers. Don’t tell your host, where will you be heading next. The easiest way of doing this is not knowing where you will be going next, yourself.

Witness to testify for the knot.

Witness, of marriageable age should be ready to sign on the registration, and you have to consider their safety too.

First & Last but not the least, be sure you both want to elope.

There should not be a change of mind, of any of the two, and marriage should be the aim for both, for in case anyone backs out the other is left high and dry to be hanged. Girl will have no place to go, while boy will be in jail for abducting a girl and trying to force her to marry her, along with witness, plus a caution for witnesses, if the girl breaks up her marriage with the boy by saying she was forced too, even after some months, the law will put you in jail too as co-conspirators. So it is important that witness also be sure that pair are perfect for each other.

Have a plan.

Have a plan, or a source of income in the new adopted home city, to start a family, be ready for a worse case scenario, that is, you may never be able to go back.

And last point for the witness, pray they live happily ever after.

PS: The author is co-conspirator of 2 eloped marriages, and had planed his own, but fortunately didn’t had to elope, and now every morning prays the other 2 couple live happily ever after.

Night life: Mumbai!

When you start your day, most people do not expect anything different from what they have been doing for years, months or at least days, such is routine. Why change things up, when everything is working fine and you are happy to live the way you do? Unless, the change is definitely going to be for the better, like a pay rise, a promotion etc, one may never hug a situation that brings about change. Be it professional life, moving to a new city, changing jobs, or getting married, history can easily prove me right. 

And now I am part of such change, for last few months, got married, changed jobs, moved to new city and now I am looking for a new place that I can call home. Home is where Heart is, and there should be at least 1 loved one be it a friend then, to meet after days work and cool your head, get rid off that stress, may be by a can of beer, a stroll on near by street, or a good movie. Each one, his/her own thing.

Living with one of my best friend, and watching Mumbai's night life on weekends has become high light of my stay here. Juhu PVR is my chill out place now and Novotel, even later in night. Till I came here, I had seen celebrities perform on screen or on stage, but never as normal people walking, having fun time with friends and watching a movie.

So till now the list of people I have seen are:

Anushka Sharma     Band Baaja Baaraat (New Comedy Hindi Film / Bollywood Movie / Indian Cinema DVD)

Bani

Tushar Kapoor (I did not identify him, for he looked too fare, compared to his screen image.)

Arunoday Singh

Sameer (1 from Big Boss)

Various TV stars and few models too.

This apart, I overheard a conversation between 2 models, and....

Model1: (Unable to balance on pencil hills, while getting on escalator flicks her hair on gaining balance.) 

Model2: "Oh! WoW! Where did u get those hair extensions from? They are looking good!"

Model1: "X place" 

Yes! She shared her secret. But point is, she took that as a compliment and the other model was actually complementing her, and my 1st thought was, "This might get bitchy!" but it did not. 

I guess, different circles in society do react differently to certain questions.

P.S.: No, I did not click any pics, or get autographs, but few smiles and my friend got stunned by flawless skin of Anushka.

Band Baaja Baraat (2 Disc Set) Bollywood DVD With English Subtitles

Mumbai!

Mumbai Fables

Life can take you anywhere, and most times it tends to change course, when it is least expected. And past one month have had similar kind of experience, changing base to Mumbai. However, once something changes in your life, you should be ready to see some beliefs turn into myths, and get dispelled. 

Bombay is the financial capital of India, everyone here talks about money, get into a local and you will find people discussing monetary transactions. And thats a fact, people here would know everything about money. However; on first day, I missed 2 locals trains, for the shear number of people getting in and out of them in mere seconds overwhelmed me, at peak hours. So I chose to take taxi.

I get into a Sardarji's taxi, after all they are said to be most honest, he takes me to my destination ( Dadar to Worli ) and charges INR 130, I complete my work, take another taxi to get back to Dadar and this time it is not a Sardarji, and he charges me INR 90, same route. Next day I drop the idea of using local train and end up on taxi again. This time it is another Sardarji, much older one though, we use same route and he charges INR 60. I cant make this stuff up! I was totally taken, for a ride, that is.

From next day I was able to catch those locals trains, without fail.

Next day I went sight seeing, BSE, Fort, RBI buildings, Fountain and all. After all I am a Finance guy, and then I visit a friend in Andheri, take an auto to his place, on way to airport, fare is normal, INR 10, so I take out a 10 Rupee coin and give it to him, and this is what I get a reply as:

"Sahab, ye rang berangi sikke yahan nahi chalte, ye India hai Amrica ya Europe nahi!" 

"Sir, this is India, such colorful coins are not legal tender here, this is not Europe or USA!" 

I have no other option, but to get my hundred rupee note changed! So Mumbai has not warmed up to new 10  Rupee coin as yet. And I had just admired RBI building!

I was looking for a place to live and I get many offers, some as low as 2,500 Rupees a month but what puts them under not affordable category, was the deposit they asked, anywhere between INR 1 Lakh to 3 Lakh! 

And then it was time to start working and hence a schedule began for me, I started taking same local, same times, and started seeing same people, most times. And soon realized how we Indians start trusting people, only because we see them again and again, and are so intrusive! One week and fellow commuters started asking me name, where I work, who is there in my family, and before that telling me things about themselves.

And some how, having me in there, with them made them nostalgic, like for how many years they have been commuting between these stations and how long they have known each other and how was there 1st job, 1st day. Man! I never felt so young, since being a baby! And this one is not even my 1st job! 

And then it struck me, seating at CST looking at a police Labrador retriever, keeping a silent watch, as if he is not surrounded by hordes of people; these must have been the guys who had witnessed Kasab, who must have lost someone or must have experienced, or must have seen a bomb go off on one off these local train. And still none of them, seemed to be afraid, remembering all the happy times, talking about 20-25 years since they have been catching the same local, not a mention of any sad history, just happy moments. So there really is a Spirit of Mumbai!

I had no idea Mumbai was so hot, literally, no I am not speaking of glamor, well I would say, I got to see more mini-skirts in Pune than in Mumbai, but amount of money I spend on buying liquids to drink-lassi, chass, cold drinks, sugar cane juice! And what not; easily amounted to 3 or 4 times the amount I spent in travelling! Humid, it was always, but hot! 

Then it happened to be the week of world cup, company allowing commentary on AIR, on floor, and we were upto minute of what was happening in the match, dint miss a ball, till we were working. also walking from station to work, I started seeing aliens, more an more of them, most Australians, speaking of being optimistic, bad case, is it not! Well, they atleast got to suck in Indian culture, local trains were a huge attraction, and so was old British buildings, and  Taxi rides! Well they were taking pictures with Taxi.

All in all, I had a good time.

Megacity Diaries: Mumbai
Dhobi Ghat (Mumbai Diaries) (Aamir Khan Productions - New Hindi Film / Bollywood Movie / Indian Cinema DVD)

Over

Few drops

perched on window pane

The sky

dressed in grey gloom

at it's best

slow rain

kissing Earth

on it's own grave

As if

Death was 

the way of day

Today

life was never

bluer

than today

Streaks of light

flashing brilliantly

Evil Arches

the thunder

Dissolving

the last bits of

courage

The fall

was eminent

the fall came

and was over

Swept away

belongings

feelings

things

that mattered

not mattered

Tears

had no value

People

had no value

swept away

before a life

Life 

could make 

a choice

It was over

Over in moments

Nature does not give chances when it wants to show case it's strength, with in moments  it can change the whole scenario. Japan has had it's share of calamities, and one more in list, but still it remains helpless, people are helpless, let alone other creatures, in front of Nature, it is not matter of fighting back but living on.

101 Great American Poems (Dover Thrift Editions)

The Giant Book of Poetry

The Random House Book of Poetry for Children

The Ripple Effect

Story 1.

The guy was having choclate chips ice cream, seating on a couch watching friends rerun, relaxed knowing he had done what needs to be done and news came in. He has just lost the job he was going to join tomorrow, a letter from company.

He just scampered to college, to principal's office and blurted out "Why has this happened with me?" lost that he was, letter had said: "As he does not meet the criteria for the placement in our company."

He was not sure what criteria had he failed, what had changed since last month, how was he qualified then and not now? "What has changed?" he asked to his sir. And they all looked preplexed as to what to say and how to console this ace of a student.

As he sat outside principles office, wondering what's going on, his friend came in....

Friend: "Dude, you just failed in final exam in ""Fundamentals of Management""

Guy: "What! You must be kidding!"

Friend: "I wish I was, but I am not, and something is wrong with the result, for I copied from you and have passed, but you have not!"

And he sat down, stunned. His world the way he knew it, just collapsed.

Story 2.

She was having time of her life! Everything was going her way, whatever she touched brought her happiness & wealth. She had never enjoyed life as now. She had made it in the world, she is successful now, and she did not need anything more.

A dream house, 2 lovely kids, a loving husband and a good job and company of her loving parents. Only problem, she never seemed to have enough time on her hands to enjoy this life as much as she would have loved to, but then who has?

Then one day, while she was working, she got a call. And she ran, as fast as she could, she wanted to be with him, her father, but she could not make it, it was too late. She could have given up anything to be with him again. All of that success did not matter now, not at all.

But it was not to be, she lost her smile, she lost her enthusiasm and she lost happiness.


Story 3.

He was driving to office, and there was goin to be a very important meeting, it was going to be make or break deal day, but traffic was proving unrelanting. Something was telling him, it was going to be a frustrating day.

And then there was an opening, and he jammed on the accelarator, and zoomed pass the traffic, scaring the hell out of an elderly.

"Hope! The elderly does not get a heart attack."

After suffering the loss of that client to company, the days of the young manager took a turn for worst, and it seemed none of the clients wanted to deal with him, for one reason or the other all seemed to be tailing the big client's tail. In frustration, he moved to inner work of company for sometime and came to technical support department for recruitment.

Just frustrated with his life, another file comes in front of the young manager, he gives one look at the result of aspiring managers who would be joining, and just gives a quick answer, after all it's not a good day at all.

"Drop all those who do not fit the citeria."


Story 4.

He is ready to take this company further up the lader of success and all he needs is a software, has shortlisted 2 candidates, and both are suitable, it is just the matter of who is the right one for them. The deal has been discussed well with first candidate and seems to fit the bill, but as is the case, it is matter of life and death, so checking up second firm is in the interest of company.

The traffic has already delayed the meeting, and then a guy zooms past them scaring the hell out of one of the elderly, who sadly dies due to a heart attack!

He tries to help save elderly's life but in vain. However, he does not make it to meeting and just decides to go with the first candidate.


Story 5.

The new and upcoming firm is in need of manforce, to serve the great quantity of new business it has been getting lately, and so visits the college of ace for recruitment, and selects him, for imediate joining.

It was not what he would have got if he had not failed that paper, but it was not bad at all, but the company promised of promoting them earlier than others, and there was no hook of getting new clients, just serving the existing ones.

Six months down the line, on an afterthought, he would not have been as happy if he would have joined that company.


Story 6.

Once the shock of her fathers death subsided, the teacher felt she had not done justice to students answer, which she checked while still in mourning, and decided to recheck them.

Spoke to college authorities and they relented and she rechecked all the papers from where she had left, that unfaithful day, starting from the paper of ace student, just next to the pser of his friend. He passed with flying colors.

The way things move around in this world, it is such a maze of actions and reactions, it is difficult to decipher sometimes, whether the bad morning that you are having is really your own fault or just an effect of some unrelated significant insignificant or insignificant significant happening in the world, which you are not even aware of.

Just like Ripple Effect, complexcities of waves depend on how many stones have displaced the water in pond and which shore they decide to reach.

Not your World!

You know it is not your world that you have been plucked out of your own world, abducted by alien etc when you see something different, something you thought did not existed in this world, and the street you walk down, just proves you wrong. Something of sort happened to me last week end.

1. Off all the people a poster of GURUJI Sibu Soren comes up! Seriously! Guruji!
2. The best coffee house in town is CCD! No local shop good enough to be a hangout place! Come on! CCD is not value for money! But every source said CCD.
3. The 60 KM journey takes 3 hours, and the bus driver has no remorse for being late + the volvo has no fault.
4. The electronic transfer of money takes one whole day to reflect! ICICI Bank.
5. Airtel calls to tell my papers are inadequate, about prepaid connection, while post-paid connection has no trouble, was prepaid not the easer one to bag?
6. Dog's dont bark, not at you, or any other stranger of any species. Street Dogs included.
7. Girl walks stooped, with help from 4 of her friends; no she is not hurt; her dress is too heavy. No! She is not the bride.
8. Another poster: "World Wild Famous: With Regainable rates!"

And then I came across a good innovation, soundproof toilets in a hotel.

Hotel manager: "The biggest turn off that our guest experienced during their stay here in past was some or the guy making funny noises, while emptying his bowels."

Good innovation! And from now on, the biggest turn off for guest would be manager's speech.

Disappointment!

Disappointment does not mean opposite of appointment, rather unfortunately, if I may add so. But what is disappointment really? 

Dictionary defines it as follows

Disappointment:  The noun disappointment has 2 senses:

1. an act (or failure to act) that disappoints someone 

2. a feeling of dissatisfaction that results when your expectations are not realized

I am really interested in second definition here, would that not make men disappointed in 99% of the women they meet, though on other hand women are disappointed in all the men they meet, already, so after assembling a team of managers, various scientists and psychics working with a healthy sample of general population, subjecting it to scientific procedure of research methods, mathematics of permutation and combinations, and some common sense, 95% of people living or dead lived a disappointed life.

The 5% fortunate ones are: 

1. At present infants, who would soon grow up to have a disappointed life.

2. This is poor statement but sadly, infants who die early: Ironic.(Only managers would state such a fact!)

3. The insane! (This probably includes successful managers and politicians.)

On the other hand people who disappoint some or the other, again setting up a committee of ex-service men, a judge and few old politicians, using all the monetary  resources, disregarding the common sense, using none of the scientific method, none of the people in world disappoint! After all vote bank is important.

Living world aside, a pure thought, you are bound to disappoint someone or the other in your life, and at some point of my life, so will I. So stop worrying, & start living the way you want to. 

Adda!

Yeh hain meri kholi

kabhi thi yeh 

mera adda

yahan takrate they

shishe se shishe

chalakte the jam

aaj duniya dekhta hun

shishe ke chashmo se

hain re

meri duniyan

Yeh kholi thi

kabhi mera

adda

dhun jhum

nachte the hum

raat bhar

aankhon 

ke tale hain

ab ghadde 

bade

hain re

meri duniya

kabhi meri

kholi thi

mera 

adda

yin 

plateon main

thi pasta se

shaan

aaj goliyan

karti hain 

raaj yahan

Yeh meri kholi

thi kabhi

adda

hum churate the

shbhnam

hoton se

ab aankhon ki

nami

jane hain kahan

Yeh meri kholi

thi kabhi

mera

adda

na jane 

kab ye 

ban jaye

mera magbara

jane na

hain re meri duniyan
Yeh meri kholi
adda hi rahi
hamesha
na dekha isne
sath kisika
na dekhe
koi haath
jo sajaye ye aashiyan
banaye ghar ise kabhi
hain re meri duniyan.........

Mistakes!

"My life is made of Mistakes, hope it did not begin as one and certainly do not want it to end as one."

However, that would explain a lot of things, would it not, as being mistakenly send to earth, gods big mistakes, tries to cover it up with all his might, but we are just fine bolts in a perfectly running machine which gives perfect reason for non mistakes to laugh out at, yell at, and get frustrated at. 

If life had never changed in its course and had we never grown up, we would never have anything to look back too, and nothing to analyze and say "Those were the best days of my life" or "That was a big mistake!" Even though we have moved on, life has its ways of giving us those chances to reflect on the past, I just had one such chance. Few days back I moved my place of residence and my mom has asked me to let go of some old possessions, and I started that process, and came across some interesting stuff. 

As a child I wrote some relevant things on first page of note books, on one I did not write anything, my class test book, it had only one test. I had scored 0 out of 20, but I distinctly remembered appearing for more than 1! So where are the rest?

And there they were in second test book for the same subject, guess I never showed the 1st one to mom. Second one is no better in marks department, but then I do remember my teacher smiling at me each time she handed the book to me. She must have taken the words on 1st page seriously. They were: "Life-it ain't easy, it's tough, so what's you gota do is keep a smile on your face, make world a better place to live." That did not make my world any better; I never passed her class test. I guess that's why I wrote the following on last page of book.

Instant formula of success

Boil water in iron vessel

Add 10 dry skin freckles

50 smoking sherikens

10 nails of gecko

10 dead fat bat wings

100 year old blooming lotus

I have no idea what I was reading or watching, that inspired me to consider above remedy, but then it also has not worked, may be the ingredients are too rare.

I also made a secret diary, and wrote only one thing, and that to on it's cover, "Secret Diary" well it was not that simple to open, whoever opened it, would not be able to close it, but then that would not serve the purpose of keeping things secret.

Various doodles of cars and other things made me think, whether I would have been a better designer than an engineer, well unanswerable question now.

And one more fine quote, on music class not book 

"Human aspirations are Infinite Horizons; one can attain them through music."

became

"Human Aspirations are Infinite Horizons, which can never be attained."

for maths book, which were modified to

"Human Aspirations are Infinite Horizons; one can reach through Hard-work, Determination and dedication"

by the maths teacher, as a lesson for me. 

And then there was my 1st poem, an assignment I had to do for English, it was an outcome of a mistake, I was not going to attempt poetry, but an article, however I forgot about that homework, and last moment entry, I was able to jot down few lines which turned out okay! I scored better than I had though, she gave me 6 out of 10 and since then I have never stopped trying poetry.

I have realized one thing: You cannot design your life like a park, which has all the beautiful and fun things, and not a speck of litter. For, when you are busy designing that park, other forces are busy designing dark alleys, stinky gutters, random rubble, etc etc etc, after all, you are not the only architects. Then some people do say: Good fate/bad fate is a resultant of our sins in past life.  For them: You remain stupid, until you die, then you are not enlightened, but you are simply dead stupid. 

So if there were no mistakes, life would be plain boring old story of perfection. 

Is it Appropriate?

This post is dedicated to my friends, colleagues and whoever I have communicated in my life time and consider some spoken words to be inappropriate, and I do not try to live any part of humane society.

The most inappropriate thing a woman must have asked another newly married woman to get back at her husband, in his presence "So how was your first night?" And the correspondent goes on to describe it in great detail. Guys are not behind in this game, just that the ploy is employed at start of the relationship, where in one guy tries to prove that he has spent his life achieving more than the other in dreaming up achievements.

People who are not political should say "I Don't Know" when asked about their political inclination, and not something that they just feel is right, for example: "What is your political inclination?" Ans: "Oh! I am straight."

An open invitation to get you killed. Example "To haters of same gotra marriage, be happy that your kid is marrying someone of opposite sex, same gotra is least of your problem" When the speaker shouts this out on a station in Haryana, you should get the picture, when last killings were just 2 days back. This is termed being politically correct at wrong time and place, as far as gotra is concerned, but why comparing it with gay marriages?

Grilling for the sake of personal gain; well most end up doing this, more so in some professions than others; when they themselves would rather be on the same camp. For instance: "I am quite liberal, I have nothing against same sex marriages, but they do not sound natural." This statement has been on TV lot of times. "So would you be friends with someone who is not straight?" Look the interviewer shy always from the use of word "Gay/Lesbian". This is Hypocrisy at its best, when it comes to Gay/Lesbian relationship.

In India we jump on to personal questions instantly, we do not give a second thought to how the opposite person might take it. For instance: Q: "Are you married?" A: "No" Q:"So, do you have a girlfriend?" A:"No, do you?" "No" Next day while walking in a park, you meet that colleague and go: Q: "So you have come here with your brother?"

As soon as your girlfriend goes out to take a call, her best friend asks you: "Is it possible for you to strip dance for us on bachelors party of another best friend." Well a bit extreme, but she hits on you with most obvious words. Most guys sit in same boat too. 

"Inappropriate touch" this is too vague, if you go by Indian cultural standards, any touch to Woman by Man is inappropriate, except hands in support when she asks, or accepts a man's offer; so that tab on the shoulder, pat on back are all inappropriate! That does bring me to a question: How to get a woman to pay attention to you when she is not facing you, you do not know her name and there is lot of noise?-No answer.

Gossiping! I do not have to say anything, one thing leads to another and soon a rumour is believed to be true. 

These are enough for a day!

Fasting!

Fasting is such a religious issue in our country, before we started dieting; people in India were fasting for one or the other deity on one or the other day. On going on these fasts many things are supposed to happen, a sort of wish list, for example

1. Getting a good life partner.

So much for the saying that good matches are made in heaven, nope they are bestowed on a person who does maximum fasts, with out most sincerity. I would rather go with fast concept, it explains all the failed or compromise marriages we get to see.

2. Getting Marks.

Some people are content with visiting god "temple/gurudwara/mosque" on the day of results, others on morning of the exam, and then some are hard believers in god, who think god favors those who are regular to worship place rather than the lecture where Professor chats for long hours or spending sometime with books which are matter of fact a way to worship Saraswati-the goddess of Knowledge.

3. Getting an Opportunity.

One big business opportunity/ job opportunity without any efforts into actual proceedings or knowledge is useless, but who cares when "Ram naam japo aur paraya maal apna!" (Chanting name of God Rama can make you owner of property belonging to others) then why waste ones time and effort on actually doing anything.

4. Asking for forgiveness.

This is the most awesome thing about fasting, do wrong, wrong someone and then punish self by not eating and you gain all the sympathy of the world while the victim has to forgive you and forget while situation for him/her does not change. So, one gets forgiven without undoing the wrong, but just showing that you are feeling remorse for your actions.

5. Social Cause.

From Telangana to corruption anything can be solved by this way(that's how image is projected), go on a fast, for the cause of people, gain mileage and if you are lucky enough a seat in next election and a sure win too, for people do fall for this one. And after the mileage is gained, slowly moment is put out of limelight and most people tend to forget the cause and remember the leader.

6. Love.

How come fasting or punishing oneself make him or her fall in love with you? May be 1st point applies here, instead of the best possible match you end up with the one which you want, on most occasions a sub-standard one. Sub-standard, for which person would chose to be with a person who is so unstable when it comes to mind, that s/he is ready to give life up for one other person, only another such unstable person can, I suppose.

7. Married Woman.

For getting same husband again and again! Really! I doubt this reason, i suppose it is for getting a better one next time around. On other hand I think, it is a ritual to boost male ego, that they satisfy her needs so well that she intends to get same partner for all her births in this world, after all she wishes for same husband on 7 births, but if we are really being born again and again the loop of 7 in each of the 7 births easily goes to eternity (This calculation sounds easy to me, I still have some knowledge of computer engineering left in me.:p)

8. Success of someone else.

These selfless people are in true sense fasting for happiness of others, but people do not realize that it in turn makes them happy too! I am not saying that they are not selfless, but it is kind of hobby too! If some one achieves something, which they prayed for, makes them feel connected to god, and gives them a sense of achievement. If you think I am not right just think of the day Sachin Tendulkar scored that double hundred in one day international, did not most fans pray for it, and did they not feel a sense of achievement and also happiness!

9. Inspiration/Workaholic.

Some people just forget to eat while working, these people are workaholics and then some others tend to get there brain to think right in deprived state only, after all Darwins theory of "Survival of Fittest" is not just some conspiracy theory.

Also the religious fast are best among all to perform; you can opt to eat special foods like fruits, dry fruits, special dishes, chips and what not to past the day. Interesting thing is that these all foods tend to be high calorie items on most times.

Well I am stopping my list here, but if you want to add anything, you can live that in comments section.

Optimism! Anyone?

Its morning, lovely one, there is no sun around, no rains, no wind; it’s a good morning, as I wake up and get ready, Oh! The blazer is just right size; it is falling off my shoulders but who would notice anyway! I wear the most formal dress in my life, black blazer white shirt, black pant, black tie with elegant white embroidery, back shoes and black socks and not to forget that white handkerchief.

*No I was not getting married, or dressed to kill and was not even on a date with some rich dame, but was just going to have my convocation.* So I move on to bathing and I am out of shampoo, *but nothing to worry, this is a rather perfect da, nothing in my hair a small amount of jail cannot fix!*

It is time to move out and on to bike, and as I wait for lift, which is out of order, I have to take the healthier option, the stairs, this day is awesome. *I am actually using lift and losing some of that puppy fat on my tummy.*

Stairs bring in some local news too, as dejected people climb, I smile at them beamingly and ask, “Why the long face?” And pat comes’ the reply, “Our motorbikes were stolen from the parking below. “ Holy shit! *What a wrong side to get up on such a good morning!* as I go running to my bike to check if it is there, and it is there. *And it smells so good here* as I look around I find few roses in ever pile of smelly garbage. *How lovely! #NotetoSelf Pick up roses while coming back*

Kick, start and away……as I reach first turn, *Oh! Wow! Look that road is such a colour of chocolate, as if yesterday’s rains have brought my dream of world made of chocolate to life* And on second there is a truck turned turtle and it is time for me to take the longer route. *Hmmmm…..that poor driver looks so dead* the ambulance picks up mangled body of driver and throws it in. *He would not be able to see me take my degree: first class with distinction! Poor guy! He lost his life on such a beautiful day! Yes! I know I was not getting any Nobel award, just a degree; even that Nobel is not watched by many, #NotetoSelf (Habit picked up from #twitter :p) should get an Oscar.*

And as I complete that detour, I get another look at that accident and it has caused a hell of a traffic jam. *Should buy some jam, have not had Pineapple flavour since long time.* Not a single vehicle in my lane! *Yahoo! Clean way to destiny!* Accelerate and I am almost there, except the road is blocked up by the tailing traffic from the accident. *No worries I can take that under the bridge, which none use detour.* and I am under the bridge, and does not smell at all! *Oh! Yes, it is such a nice smell, which makes one want to empty ones bladder too!* welcome to the open urinal of the slum nearby, and  I simply hope now, not open toilet too.

And my institute is here, and I am on way to the auditorium, when I learn my name is not in list, because they did not get my email of confirmation! While I was among the ones who confirmed  on the very first day the bookings opened! I do not get a dress for the same reason; no degree on stage for lack of time and in this last bit, my friends gave me company.

And that was the sudden death of Optimism for me, thought something’s have changed, something’s would change too and we are back to square one, one more management institute doing mismanagement, but then this convocation was left to 1^st year 1^st semester students with no supervision! Great going, great lesson from a good blunder!

Past relationship - Baggage!

                         Many people have wondered over this question for long, and most say in case you are not the first boyfriend or girlfriend of your current, you have to face baggage of past relationships, but when one says past relationships, why do people forget that having boyfriend or girlfriend is a very small percentage of all relationships that all we people have over our lives!

                         If you are a girl, have you not come to meet a guy who is  Mama's boy "Maa da Ladla?"  A foodie; "Why you can not cook like my mother?" or a rebellious,"Baap ke virudh!" A guy who spends more time with his friends or playing football/cricket or even a pet, rather than with you?

                         On other hand if you are a guy, have you not seen a girl who does not lie to her parents, or at least to mother not even once, or a girl who says you are like my dad/you are not at all like him "father figure" and girl nights or friends who are boys but not boy friends "Z does not treat me this way?"  "Z" cause, he is the last person, you would consider to be compared with!

                        If you thought parents are enough, have you considered siblings? A girl would go "Do not even think of me, you are not bad, but my brother would kill you if he comes to know!" This is the same brother, whose love marriage you attended last month, and when you remind her about this; "He thinks I am good and little girl, and I do no want to break his heart!" Mind you, words can differ from "My brother is a body builder to thrasher of his sister's lover."

                        Guys would go on to say; "Wear clothes like my sister when you come to my home, Ok!" or "My sister does not have a boy friend, so she is of excellent character!" -Like "Wo dudh ki dhuli" She is ever going to let him know! Further "She does not even have any guy as a friend in her group!" as if he has a sniffer dog behind her. And for the same reason your character is suspect!

                         Now how can you ever say that relationships do not come with the past?

                         *This post is an entry under "Do all relationships come with the past? Soch Lo!" contest. please vote for me on IndiVine  http://www.indiblogger.in/indivine.php*